In my last article, I opened up a bit about my life. I talked about the difficulties I experience in terms of meals with my children. I had a lot of super positive reactions.
So I said to myself that I would continue in this line. I'm going to tell you a bit about my reality… It lets me off steam and I realize that I'm not alone in my reality. Honestly, it's really cool to read your comments which also reassure me in my "madness". This time, it is related to the fact that I asked myself: “Who is taking leave today?”.
Like many of you, I work. I work to pay for the car, the house, the groceries… and a few splurges. In fact, the reality is that if I was working alone, I wouldn't have any little splurges. My wife also works, for the same reasons. Our salaries are both important.
Like many of you, I have children. In fact, I have three. It is therefore implicit that I must be absent from work more often than a single person. Exactly, this week, my youngest was sick.
"Dad, there's more. »
It was five in the morning, and my youngest was throwing up, but nothing came out. He looked at me and said that with a look of confusion. It was very disturbing. My instinct was to ask myself: “Who is going to take the day off today? »
It was really a reflection that both my wife and I had. I know this, because before I could say anything, my wife informed me that she had taken time off last time, and this time she couldn't. It was my turn.
My wife is under contract. On contract, because these days people who work in government-run companies aren't permanently hired for a decade. It is their way, I believe, of coping with the reality of a union that has acquired too much power. Either way, she's on contract. So she has a precarious job. It can be kicked out easily. A bit like a diaper, we change it regularly hoping that eventually we will not need it anymore.
Taking time off shows that you are a “risk”. Taking time off is not super easy. In fact, hiring a mother can be considered a risk, I think. My wife has already seen her position abolished two weeks before her return from her maternity leave.
My son started throwing up again, but nothing came out. I said to myself: “Too bad if my employer thinks that I am taking time off. My son needs me. »
That's when I realized I was a little pathetic. I lived a guilt of missing work. A guilt, because I was going to be less efficientthat week. A concern that others would think that again, because of my child, I allowed myself time off.
I like to work
I like to work very much. I like to get out of the house, and feel that I am fulfilled in something. I don't like the fact that my children spend too much time in daycare. I like less the fact that in the evening and in the morning, I am caught in a train traveling at 1000 km/h and that taking the time to enjoy my children is not so much possible, except for the weekends. Because I leave home at 7 a.m. to drop the kids off at daycare and get to work around 8:15 a.m. (sometimes 8 a.m., sometimes 8:30 a.m.).
I then leave to pick up the children in the evening and arrive home around 5:45 p.m. (sometimes 6:00 p.m.). We have supper, bath, homework and it's already bedtime. I didn't really enjoy them, right?
So I shouldn't feel guilty for staying home and taking care of them when they are sick. Even if it means that I am a little less at work compared to the young 20 year old. This is my reality. However, I can't help but feel that it makes my work colleagues "sweat" if I miss a day. This is surely what explains why the days when we are absent are the days when we receive the most emails or messages on our voicemail. Maybe it's a feeling. This is surely an impression.
The best seat
I just wish I didn't have to live with guilt when I announceto human resources that I miss, again, for my youngest this time.
No, the last time was the oldest. This time it's the youngest. Yes, I know that we have to deliver a "pitch" for next week, I will finish it. Yes, we can meet on the phone. Could it be 1:30 p.m. during siesta? Yes, I'm on my records, but we can take a quick tour if you want.
The worst thing is that me, I'm lucky, I have a boss who understands my reality, at least, I think. I think I put pressure on myself because of the environment and the society that wants us to perform. Because I want to make sure that I provide a better and better life for my children. Because I want to climb the ladder and always have a better place at work. A better place in society.
However, the best place is often at home. Sometimes with a feverish little boy who is glued to you and says "I love you".