2023 Author: Anita Thornton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-05-22 03:30
Friendship is important for every human being, but especially for children. Here are a few reasons why they couldn't live without it.
Friendship before 2 years
Since birth, baby has forged ties of attachment with his parents and siblings. Even if he is in contact with other children, at daycare for example, he has not, strictly speaking, formed friendships. "Between 0 and 2 years old, it's the period of parallel play," says Stéphane Cantin, associate professor at the school of psychoeducation at the University of Montreal. Thus, even if the child is surrounded by "friends", they will rather play next to each other without necessarily talking to each other. “It will be a lot of learning by imitation. It’s not yet friendship,”said Mr. Cantin.
Friendship from 3 years old
It is around the age of 3 that children will develop their first real friendships. “Friendship is a reciprocal agreement between two people. It is a choice that must be shared,” says Stéphane Cantin. It is therefore around the age of 3 that children begin to be able to identify who their friends are… and that these choices are truly reciprocal
Who saysreciprocal does not necessarily say stable. Indeed, before the age of 6-7, the bonds of friendship can sometimes seem a little eccentric to us. Who has never heard a "he's my best friend" after a play session at the park with a child met on the scene a few minutes earlier? And what about "he's not my friend anymore" after an unfounded spat?
Through the ages, friendship will carve out an increasingly important place in the lives of our children, and will therefore become more and more stable. Until 10 years old, for children, the important thing will be to be part of a group, to be with others. Later, around the age of 10-12, the importance will rather be given to friends as a source of social support and recognition. "Friends become the center of life, more than the group," says Mr. Cantin.
Why is friendship so important?
Friendship is essential in the lives of our children, especially because it allows them to develop a host of social skills. Among these: the art of negotiation, respect for others, control of one's behavior and emotions, sensitivity to the emotions of others, management of conflicts, cooperation, etc. "It's by interacting with friends that we refine these social skills," says Stéphane Cantin.
Friendship is also a form of social support. Some life transitions will be much easier to navigate with a good friend by your side. This is particularly the case for returnsschools. “Already, in first grade children, we see that they will experience the kindergarten-primary transition much more easily if they have a friend in the group,” supports Mr. Cantin. The friend will then play a role of social support. He will be there to comfort, secure, give advice. The children will be able to support each other and thus be less stressed… whether it is for entry into primary or secondary level.
Parents, the first model
We cannot repeat it enough: parents are the first role models for children. If we want our children to form deep and genuine friendships, we should start by doing it ourselves. And with all these benefits, we'd be crazy not to!
