2023 Author: Anita Thornton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-05-22 03:30
She's been watching you put on makeup for a long time. Maybe she envies you, or admires you… Time passes, and now she too wants to make up her lips or her eyes before going to school…
Watching your children grow up can be difficult, even though we know very well that it is natural. Sometimes it feels like it's going a little too fast… like when our daughter starts to dip into our make-up bag. Is she too young to wear makeup? How to react to his requests? Should we accept that she paints her cheeks and lips, or refuse categorically, on the pretext that she is still a child? Mamanpourlavie.com spoke about this with Dr. Mélanie Laberge, psychologist and director of the Childhood-Family component at the Change cognitive behavioral psychology clinic.
Is there an “acceptable” age to start wearing makeup?
There is no age considered acceptable for a girl to wear makeup; it is according to the values of each parent. Traditionally, young girls began to take an interest in makeup in their early teens. For some, the interest or even the wearing of makeup marks a ritetransition to adolescence. It is therefore more common to see 11-12 year old girls starting to wear a few touches of makeup. Others may not be interested in it at all and still make the transition to adolescence.
How to intervene with a child who wants to wear makeup?
Before setting up prohibitions, you must open the dialog:
- Why does she want to wear makeup?
- What does she want to wear?
- Does she feel pressure to do this?
- Do the girls in his social circle do it?
- Is it just to do like the others?
- Is she doing it to please someone?
By asking questions and discussing, the child will feel that his need is taken seriously. It will be more open to potential compromises. Through these discussions, we want to find the reason or reasons that motivate his desire. If you do not accept that the young person wears makeup, you must talk to her about the values that you value, which really matters to you. The child would also benefit from learning to value themselves based on more important things, such as their personality, interests, openness to the world, etc. In short, the child must understand the reasons for the refusal.
Interesting numbers
- 25, 4% of girls aged 4-5 wear lip gloss occasionally
- 13% of girls aged 8-10 wear makeup
(Source: Study Tiggemann, M. & Slater, A. (2012). Contemporary girlhood: Maternal reports onsexualized behavior and appearance concern in 4-10 years old girls)
Are there any limits?
Depending on the child's age, the parents' values and the reasons for wearing make-up (to be accepted by others, to please someone, film themselves while wearing make-up), the frequency make-up (special outings vs. every day), the discretion of make-up (small discreet gloss vs. "contouring"), the parent can decide to set certain limits.
Consistency is also key. It can be difficult for the child to understand and accept certain limits if the female role models in her immediate environment (dolls, shows, her mom, her big sister, etc.) wear makeup the way she would like. Diversifying patterns, explaining age differences, and ensuring you're a consistent pattern will help enforce boundaries.
Can the use of makeup indicate a lack of self-confidence? When to Worry?
A young girl's desire to wear makeup is not necessarily linked to a lack of self-confidence or low self-esteem. Particularly among the youngest, the interest may be to want to do like the adult, nothing more. So there is not always cause for concern.
A parent may start to worry if, as with anything, makeup becomes intrusive (she doesn't want to be seen with her makeup off, takes a lot of time, invests a lot of money in buying makeupmakeup).
Are there any limits?
Depending on the child's age, the parents' values and the reasons for wearing make-up (to be accepted by others, to please someone, film themselves while wearing make-up), the frequency make-up (special outings vs. every day), the discretion of make-up (small discreet gloss vs. "contouring"), the parent can decide to set certain limits.
Consistency is also key. It can be difficult for the child to understand and accept certain limits if the female role models in her immediate environment (dolls, shows, her mom, her big sister, etc.) wear makeup the way she would like. Diversifying patterns, explaining age differences, and ensuring you're a consistent pattern will help enforce boundaries.
Can the use of makeup indicate a lack of self-confidence? When to Worry?
A young girl's desire to wear makeup is not necessarily linked to a lack of self-confidence or low self-esteem. Particularly among the youngest, the interest may be to want to do like the adult, nothing more. So there is not always cause for concern.
A parent may start to worry if, as with anything, makeup becomes intrusive (she doesn't want to be seen with her makeup off, takes a lot of time, spends a lot of money on makeup).
Do girlsmake up younger and more than before?
A recent study from 2014 shows that girls show signs of hypersexualization as young as 4 years old. For these authors from Australia and England, makeup is one of them, just like wearing “sexy” clothes or high heels. The study reports that 25.4% of 4-5 year old girls wear lip gloss occasionally, but only 13% of 8-10 year old girls wear makeup. So there seems to be a trend for little girls to wear much younger makeup, but that's not the norm either.
Tiggemann, M. & Slater, A. (2012). Contemporary girlhood: Maternal reports on sexualized behavior and appearance concern in 4-10 years old girls. Body Image, 11, pp. 396-403.
