At this time of the year that brings us to stop, reflect and reflect on the last twelve months, we often make a very negative assessment of our year. Filled with “I should have…”.
We rarely throw flowers at each other about the role that inhabits 110% of our existence, our role as parents.
Even before becoming a mom, I was lucky to be surrounded by several moms who were at various stages of their parenthood. No matter the age of the children, each mother lives a reality of her own, and there is a common denominator between all these mothers: we can never do enough!
My son just turned 3, and the last few months have been tough! In full bloom and in search of autonomy, the crises multiplied, and my patience disappeared. Every month, it seems like we tackle a new challenge; the joys of childhood and development it seems. So it goes without saying that the last few months have been very difficult, especially since we add to this mix a new daycare and a new job for mom. The perfect cocktail to spice up a gray, cold and depressing autumn.
Then, during a meeting of parents with the educators of his new daycare, I was told, with the greatestjoy, that my child is the happiest in his group. Forget here the aspect of comparison with the other children in his group. Key words to remember here: my child is happy. These four words have echoed in my head and in my heart since that evening.
Since my separation when he was only 6 months old, I tell myself that I took away his chance to have a family. That with a father so little present in his life, he will miss something. That with a mother who finds it very difficult to reconcile work and family, he is bored playing alone in the evening. That he has already been through too many changes for his young age and that I need to be a better person and a better mother. Always telling myself that I have to be better, then… I stop.
My child is happy. That's every parent's ultimate goal, right? Regardless of the situation in which you find yourself, the resources you have or lack, the bank account that is full or still close to being empty, we all have the same balance sheet to achieve every year, every day: joy and he alth.
So, this year, my assessment is not to feel sorry for what went less well during the year and what I have to work on next year. My assessment is a nice pat on the back. Despite the circumstances, the pitfalls and the unexpected, we came out of it he althy and happy. Then, I can only hope the same will happen next year.
Take time to look around you, not at the possessions you own, but at the happiness thatsurrounds you and, with that, have a great holiday season and a very happy new year!
