2023 Author: Anita Thornton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-05-22 03:30
January normally marks the month of resolutions and to get the year off to a good start, why not offer blended families a way to see things differently when things don't go as they would like?
Yes it's true that sometimes the subject of blended families can be considered taboo, but if we don't take the time to deal with it, how can we make sure every member is happy?
I am part of a blended family and beyond being a coach, my personal experience allows me to dare to share with you how I see things. For me, believing that a blended family can be happy is possible even if it may seem like a complicated matter. If your intention is to be successful, you are ready to read the 8 keys to a successful blended family.
Accept that time is an ally. Yes, taking time to take time is essential. Listening to children's feelings, talking with your new spouse, having fun with each other's children, doing family activities takes considerable time. It's up to you to decide if this time becomes a priority for you.
To be wrong is okay. Each challenge or error is a learning process to be better equipped the next time and ensure the success of the blended family. Thanking mistakes teaches you how to be better!
Patience and listening from each member of the family can make a big difference. Everyone has their point of view and deserves to be heard with openness. Even write down the ground rules with the children and post them in a place they will see every day. They will respect them since they will have been part of the co-creation of these. And if you're daring, share it with the exes!
Adding a dose of humour can play down any event. Just take a step back and tell yourself that life is simple when you don't complicate it. Humor releases tension.
Don't blame the blended family. Yes, all good families have conflicts and arguments so the blended family doesn't have more than another.
Keeping children out of parental conflict. Avoiding bad language about the ex can reassure the child of their right to love the new spouse. Children only ask to love both parents and also new spouses. In addition, the child will be less likely to have a conflict of loy alty. It means he won't feel guilty for being nice to everyone.
Give your children the right to be happy in both families. Children need this permission and theyfeel it when it's not authentic. Help them to better accept their new life. Listening carefully to their stories when they come home can be a great way to show them.
Realize that you are becoming a new model of love. Kiss each other in front of the children, it's good for them to see and feel that life together harmony is possible, it will remain etched in their memory for life.
The benefits of a blended family
To conclude, I thought it might be time to see the benefits of a blended family. Here's what the blended family can do.
- It allows the child to improve his coping skills. It's not always easy to walk from one house to another but it allows him to adapt to many situations.
- It helps to open up to other members in a family. Sometimes, for an only child, it's learning to share with other children.
- Everyone can take more time for themselves. When the children are with you, take full advantage of them. They therefore have the full attention of the parent who does several activities with them. When they are with the other spouse, you take advantage of your time to take care of yourself or to spend time with your new lover.
- New lovers can become new models of love for children.
- Finally, for the person who finds himself alone, tell yourself that a new life is beginning for you and that it is timethat you take care of your happiness.
