When you feel judged at the pediatrician

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When you feel judged at the pediatrician
When you feel judged at the pediatrician
Anonim

When the pediatrician's questions never end and I feel like I'm being judged on all my answers… I failed the test. My answers weren't up to par. I am not a good mother.

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Am I the only one this is happening to?

I want to first clarify that this is not an attack on my child's pediatrician. She is qualified, competent and she never wastes my time (which is a great quality for a doctor). I rarely see her because the vaccines are administered by the nurse so we only meet twice a year.

It is therefore his duty to update himself on my son's progress and go through his exhaustive checklist. How many words does he say? Does he still have a suck? What are his favorite foods? Does he run? Jumped up? On one leg? On the head? Wow… i'm going away. In short, you follow me. This famous questionnaire which makes sure that our child is developing well and reaching the milestones he should reach for his age.

So far so good. Answering his questions is nothing intrusive and even allows me to brag a little…

Long livereactions

For this meeting, I had arrived with my little list of ailments that I wanted us to explore in depth: recalcitrant eczema and ear pain despite the absence of otitis, among others. She quickly made me feel inadequate in the way I treated them.

Take his eczema for example. My son does a lot, a lot, on his stomach and back. Funny places to get eczema but still affected. I tried almost every cream, with and without cortisone (yes yes, throw rocks at me, I put cortisone on my child's fragile skin!), I changed laundry detergent, chose another soap, etc. I have really tried everything and although the symptoms have diminished, they have never completely disappeared…

My pediatrician took a look at my son's skin and played a tune of "oh! » « ah! ". She said to me: “We have to cure that! ". The eyes must have rolled me ten times. Just a quick reminder: that's one of the reasons I'm here, doctor. I need help and advice, not strong reactions that only increase my feeling of incompetence.

Anyway, maybe I'm exaggerating my reaction. Should have been there.

Tips vs Rules

The exam is over. We begin the ladder portion of growth and advice for development. Since the age of two months, my son has not been on the growth scale. So I'm looking at little red dots scrolling above a curve.

And that's whenthe answers I gave to the previous checklist come back… Does he still have his pacifier? We should think about taking it away! He likes yogurt? Cut out the dairy products! His eczema? Her skin must be beautiful again!

Do you know where I'm coming from? Each, but really, each of the small points of pride listed at the beginning of the meeting are reviewed… and must be improved.

I walked into the pediatrician proud, proud of my son's development – and left feeling low and feeling like I wasn't doing enough.

After a few days of moping, I realized that my son is happy and… he althy. My pediatrician gave me “advice” and not “rules”. We then interpret and apply these tips as we want, after all!

What do you say?

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